26 March 2010

What I've Given Up

Before we began this blog, I used to write for an audience of one – Daddy. He would often read me posts from other D/s blogs, posts that he found especially erotic or applicable to our relationship. I’ll never forget the first day that I surprised him with a blog that I had “found” (actually, I was the author of the post), and after I read it to him, he exclaimed, “Wow…that must have really resonated with you.” I giggled to myself and said that it sure had…and then he realized exactly how much the post resonated with me. I had completely surprised him and he loved it! Even from the very beginning, he was encouraging and appreciative of my writing…so much so in fact that he began giving me ideas that he wanted me to write about.

There are two suggestions of his that I have yet to discuss although many months have passed since he originally mentioned them. They have never left my mind, but rather have floated around, gaining steam and weight until the time came when I would be capable of fully exploring and describing the ideas in all their glorious simplicity. Daddy wanted one post about what I’d given up as his slave and one post about what I’d gained as his slave.

Here is the first of those entries…


It would be simple to say that I’ve given up “everything” and be done with it, but then I wouldn’t be doing our relationship much justice or showing you the respect that you deserve for being my Master. In essence, this is exactly what I’ve given up, but the true beauty of relinquishing everything that I’ve ever had or ever known lies in the minutiae – those all-important little things that seem to blend into the fabric of our day-to-day lives and that are always there just under the surface…

I’ve given up control of my orgasms.
I’ve given up denying access to my body.
I’ve given up my rights.
I’ve given up my safe word.
I’ve given up my hard limits.
I’ve given up pushing back.
I’ve given up my job.
I’ve given up my home.
I’ve given up fears of rejection.
I’ve given up freedom and any possibility for escape.
I’ve given up my birth name to become baby girl, little one, pain slut, whore, etc.
I’ve given up the air that I breathe.
I’ve given up the word “no”.
I’ve given up my very life.
I’ve given up…everything.

This list is almost frightening in its minimalism and its brutal honesty. Daddy has stripped me of everything that I once was, but what he has made of me and what he has given me in return is what is truly remarkable… (to be continued)

6 comments:

  1. Yes, you've given up a lot but what he's given you is so, so much more. He's trained you and will continue to train you to be the submissive that you want to be. Don't you get wet just thinking about how you're going to submit to him, obey his wishes and be the submissive that he wants you to be and you want to be? I'm sure you get very wet just thinking about your life as his submissive. He's taken you on a journey of a lifetime and made you very happy. Among other things, he controls your orgasms, but when he allows them, they're very explosive.

    Continue to enjoy the journey and share it with your readers.

    FD

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  2. You are so very right, FD! :) What I have gained is infinitely more substantial and impressive than what I've given up as his submissive. I'm sure you'll appreciate the follow-up post - "What I've Gained" - that I'm going to write tomorrow! :) Thanks for writing and have a great weekend!

    Take care,
    Baby Girl :)

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  3. I agree with what FD mentioned. In addition I would say that you have gained the "you" that you need and want to be. He has shown you who you can be for him and yourself. That is priceless. And...of all the things you listed that you have given up, I'd say that really you have gained those through your submission, not lost them. It's all in how you choose to view it.

    You obviously are in a great place in your submission, and that is to be commended for you both. Enjoy the ride, as it only keeps getting better and more fulfilling!

    DV

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  4. Hi DV!

    You know, it's funny... Right before your comment appeared, Daddy read my post and let me know what he thought of it. His reaction was almost identical to yours! He held my head in his arms and cradled me against him...and then reminded me of everything that I gained when I turned myself over to him.

    All I have to say is that there seems to be an impatience epidemic that is running rampant through this blog! I promised a second part and I'll be sure to post it tomorrow! (Just teasing a bit!) hehe... ;)

    Methinks that FD, you, and Daddy are in cahoots over this post! The best part is yet to come...

    Take care,
    Baby Girl :)

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  5. BG - I appreciate your post, not meaning to make it sound like the Doms who have posted do not, but I am the only submissive (so far anyway) who has posted a response. I see both sides, all that we are willing to give up for our Dom, and all that we gain from them.

    Wonderfully written!!

    SBG

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  6. Thanks for writing, SBG! It's always so vital to get the submissive perspective as well...and to know that at least some of what I write resonates with those of us out there! :)

    Take care,
    Baby Girl :)

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