09 October 2011

On Being the Man Who Chokes Baby Girl

God do I love wrapping my hand around baby girl's throat.

After much thought about D/s and my attitudes over it during the past few years, I think I've come to realize that what I love about being a Dom isn't as much power as it is trust. When I wrap my hand around baby girl's throat and squeeze, I think -- if I'm as reflective as I can be -- that what turns me on is the fact that she trusts me to do whatever I choose, whatever I think to be right for her, for myself, for both of us. She trusts me enough to have willingly surrendered her right to a safe word, willingly surrendered her right to ever leave, or to ever even request to be released. She trusts me enough to have given me the right to do whatever I choose with her. On a regular basis, that includes strapping her wrists to the bed, rendering her helpless, and then choking her until, as she notes above, the last bit of air in her lungs is going out. She literally puts her life in my hands.

Yes, there's tremendous power in that. But interestingly enough, I'm not a power addict. I've never sought power in my work, though I've certainly had it given to me (on at least one occasion specifically because I didn't seek it). I've never been the type to want to be in charge of the PTA, want to be in charge of the homeowners association. I just have no interest in it.

I respect all forms of D/s relationships, but I honestly find the idea of a relationship in which I micro-managed every aspect of baby girl's life to be tiresome -- I have little or no interest in telling her what to wear, how to style her hair, how to clean the house, how to do her job, or the like. Not only do I not want that power, I'd find it annoyingly time-consuming.

Baby girl understands that my control over her is absolute. She has a wonderful job, but she knows that if I ordered her to give it up in order to focus all her attention on me, she would have no choice. She likes where we live now, and we have completely compatible goals about where we want to live in the future, but she knows that if I made a different decision, ordered her to pack up and move, she would have no choice. And yet it's rare that I exercise this control outside of the bedroom, or outside of a context at least related to our sexual relationship. When I do, it's usually because I'm overriding baby girl in what I believe to be her own interest -- you have to work out now, you have to go to the doctor now, you have to get to urgent care now, that sort of thing. Again, power exercised for its own sake holds no appeal to me.

But the trust? That's insanely erotic. Just writing about it has made me rock-hard.

And ready for baby girl.


  1. Other than the choking, you've described my Daddy. He doesnt' micromanage me...in fact, he expects me to do what I need to do without his input, but he can and will tell me what to do if the situation warrants. He has complete control over me and like you and your baby girl I don't have a safe word. His word is LAW in the bedroom and out of it.

    He's a CEO so being in control and in charge comes naturally to him, but he's not obnoxious about it. He can be the most gentle man, but if crossed his will is iron and he WILL get his way, much to my chagrin at times when I fight it. That's what attracted me to him in the first place...his ability to have absolute control over me so effortlessly.


  2. The micromanagement concept boggles my mind too. It does sound absolutely exhausting. I'm perfectly capable of managing myself - though I suppose some people must not be!

    Thanks for your perspective; it's awesome.

  3. I am thrilled that Daddy doesn't micromanage me! A few years ago, when I first came to the realization that I needed to be in a D/s relationship in order to be fulfilled sexually, the idea of micromanagement was a major turn-off for me and almost convinced me that I didn't want the D/s lifestyle at all if that's what it entailed.

    Thankfully, I met Daddy and we turned out to be perfectly compatible in our needs and desires...and yes, I trust him completely. I wouldn't have willingly surrendered all my rights to him otherwise. And we've never been happier. :)

    Oh, and as an aside, I just took a look at the time of his post (right around the time that Daddy was writing about how he was "rock-hard" and "ready for baby girl")... Not five minutes later, Daddy came upstairs and gave me a nice "good morning" fucking. He used me thoroughly and I loved every minute of it!

    Trust is a beautiful thing... :)

  4. By "gave me a nice 'good morning' fucking", what baby girl meant is that I came upstairs, closed the door to the bedroom (our cat is never allowed in), closed the window (we're both loud), and stripped, all before she was awake. I pulled the covers back and attached the leash to her collar, which she had worn all night, and just climbed on top of her and pushed my way inside. I took the handle end of the leash and had her hold it in her mouth as I fucked her.

    After ordering her to a couple of orgasms that way, I climbed off long enough to take each of the under-the-mattress straps and clip them to her cuffs, which she had also worn all night. With baby girl secured to the bed, I climbed back on top of her, spreading her legs wide to the side as I rammed my cock back into her.

    With baby girl collared, leashed, cuffed, and strapped to the bed, my cock inside her, and her legs splayed out to each side, I started slapping her breasts, back and forth, harder and harder, until I could see her eyes rolling back in her head and she went quiet, meaning she was heading into subspace. I yanked her back by ordering her to cum and she came *hard*. Another orgasm or two this way and I put her ankles up over my shoulders so I could really pound my way to my own orgasm. As I came, I rammed my cock as deeply into her, partly to see the pain on her face as I did, partly so that my cum would spray directly onto her cervix, but mostly just because it feels so fucking good to shove my cock in as deeply as it will go when I'm orgasming.

    So that was our "nice 'good morning' fucking".

  5. The micromanaging I think is a matter of preference. Some like it - some don't -- which can be said about pretty much anything.

    The choking - I agree. For me it's about the ability to trust. I also like the sense of submission it brings. Very hot!

  6. To "Daddy",

    Your comment made me say Wow!!! Glad to know that Baby Girl is as taken care of as I am by my Daddy;)!


  7. Thanks, Daddy for sharing this. I am so jealous. You guys are amazing.

    Last night, I was choked during very rough sex for almost two hours both with a leash and hubby's hand and then with his hands around my throat, he whispered harshly for the first time ever, "Tell me when you're going to come. I'm going to find your pulse and cut it off..." I don't generally respond well to expected orgasms, but well ... you can use your imagination.

    But then I got the dreaded "That was fun" statement afterward again. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong. Maybe I'm just expecting too much out of this. :(

  8. Lovely post. You both have a beautiful dynamic which is difficult to find in or out of the lifestyle.

  9. Very interesting to read about your relationship dynamic, as someone who's been in a religiously-based (not BDSM-based) submissive marriage for years. I would say my husband falls into the category of not micro-managing most things such as housework, but he certainly does have exacting requirements for things such as the modest of mine and our daughter's clothing, which I understand. Many things in our life are how I wish them to be, but with the understanding (like you mentioned) that if they were not to be according to his will any longer, they would change immediately. He made me quit my job this past spring for instance. He had myself and my daughters start wearing opaque stockings year round and also sleeves all the way to the wrist. He is specific as to how he wishes me to cover my hair. But ultimately, most of my submission to him does happen in the intimate realm - The realm where I am truly a toy for him to use as he pleases, and a vessel to bear children who will serve the Lord.

  10. Am I the only one who finds this disgusting and repulsive? "Daddy" is the reason so many guys get labeled as losers and, "Baby Girls" is the reason so many women are labeled as weak and pathetic. You guys make me sick.

  11. When someone takes the trouble to find a blog like ours, to click past the adult content warning, to want to read it knowing full well its tone from the title and description, to read the entries, and then to add a comment passing judgment on what we consenting adults do in the privacy of our own home -- well, to say I find it puzzling on multiple levels would be an understatement.

    1. I liked your description of why you like choking her, any thoughts on why she likes you doing it? I like to be dominated by a guy (though not to the point you describe) but I just love being choked, it is something really desperate, really basic, something essentially so beyond control that it really turns me on.
      What does daddy's little girl say?